Dear Advertiser,

Just a Little Friendly Advice

Just Do What She Says November 30, 2007

Filed under: Love, KR,TV — K @ 12:59 pm
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So evidently this ad is from 2005, but you’ve been running it quite a bit these days and even produced some new follow up spots. Hooray for consistency. On the other hand, I don’t think this guy would be too happy with you. Oprah’s organization guru is all about clearing out those closets and “owning your stuff, not letting your stuff own you.” And, really, do you want to be disagreeing with Oprah? That can’t bode well for business.




Not Exactly What I Would Call Competition

Filed under: Insulting,TV — K @ 12:55 pm
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Dear Cable,

Whenever my dear friends and I see your “When Cable Competes…You Win” advertisements, we went to do what this nice little old lady did. Everybody’s main beef with cable is that the prices are jacked up and the customer service totally sucks…and why? Because you don’t have to compete with anybody!! Sure, cable has been able to compete with phone companies, but the idea of cable companies competing with each other is what we all really want. So, really, you are just pissing me off with this self-righteous attitude that you are making our lives better – which you aren’t.

Not to mention, why does every person in your ads have a serious twang? Are these the only people who appreciate cable? Though, from my understanding, most folks in the country have to use satellite anyways. How about allowing for some competition and I’ll start to take you seriously. Until then, the household slogan of “Drop the Bomb on Mediacom” will remain in place.




On Demand. November 28, 2007

Filed under: Keep It Up,Love, KR — K @ 12:21 pm
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Dear Cotton,

This is a primary demand advertisement?! Whaaat? It’s chic, it’s visually terrific, and I didn’t even know it was for cotton! Cotton! After years of dealing with “The Other White Meat” and what I consider to be the tired old Milk ads, this is so darn refreshing!

Another great ad after the jump.



Think Globally, Place Media Buys Locally November 16, 2007

Filed under: Love, KR,TV — K @ 11:53 am
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Dear Dunkin’ Donuts,

I’ve heard you have great coffeee. However, where I’m from, most Dunkin’ Donuts went out of business about 7 years ago and were replaced by “County Donuts and Liquor” (No, I did not make that up.) So, the new commercials – where the Dunkin’ Donuts coffee now being sold at grocery stores is snapped up so fast they can barely stock the shelves – just don’t really ring with those here in Middle America. My suggestion is more targeted buys telling consumers who don’t know about your coffee precisely why it’s being snapped up so darn quickly.



PS – I’ll probably try it anyways, I love that Rachel Ray.


The Ick Factor November 12, 2007

Filed under: Love, KR,Really?!,TV — K @ 2:25 pm
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Dear Buckley’s,

I do not care how well your cough syrup works – and everyone else I’ve spoken with agrees. If I cannot tell the difference between your product and “pig tongue scrapings” or a “public restroom puddle,” I will stick with Vicks or anything else that is medicine flavored.

I understand you are running the spots in male dominated markets (SpikeTV), but even guys are not that disgusting. I think you can have a disclaimer about the nastiness without inducing the desire to vomit.




Right on Target November 7, 2007

Dear Patron Spirits,

Your “some perfection is debatable” ads are charming and drive the point home: Patron is damn good te-kill-ya tequila, no arguing about it. They have been even more elevated by the slight tweak that is keeping them fresh and innovative. The tweak I am speaking of is the ads that are perfectly tailored to the television show during which they air. During the Daily Show we get 2 guys arguing at a bar, one is for “Headlines,” the other for “Punchlines.” Last night during Nip/Tuck we had two women who were taking sides based on the show’s title. This little twist based on extremely targeted media buys brings new life to an already strong campaign strategy.

Keep It Up!




ADVERTISE STRONG. November 6, 2007

Filed under: Keep It Up,Love, KR,TV — K @ 3:02 pm
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Dear Doritos,

I will not eat a Dorito, I will not look at a Doritio, I will not allow myself to be within 10 feet of a Dorito.

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way….